We’ve all had those dreams that wake us up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat. Sometimes we aren’t even sure what we were dreaming about, but we know it was bad. Nightmares are not one of the pleasant things in life. And like a nightmare, as homeschoolers we can sometimes find ourselves unexpectedly, in a sudden state of awareness that leaves us gasping for air. We may find that our child is not where they should be academically, or that we forgot to do something that was important to their educational experience or necessary credits for graduation. It can happen to even the most effective of homeschoolers. So what is a homeschooling family to do in order to avoid those nightmares?
Sometimes, a homeschooling nightmare, like a real nightmare, just happens. We think we are moving along appropriately and then find that we dropped the ball somewhere. When that happens, it is important to remember that we will “wake up” eventually. We didn’t want to be set off course, but in the process of the unfortunate experience, we will work through it, and there will be a resolution, just like every nightmare comes to a conclusion. So, don’t panic. Don’t make rash decisions or take impulsive actions. Remember your core values and reasons that you began to homeschool in the first place and slowly begin to take the steps to get back to where you need to be. Impulsive actions will only harm your homeschool program or your children, so act with intentional care as you move forward, keeping your vision and your values in mind.
Another cause of nightmares is because of something that we ate or watched before we went to bed. Like this, some homeschooling nightmares are because of an action that we have taken that spirals out of control into consequences that we now have to face. Try to determine what the cause was, or that underlying decision that you made, that has taken you off track. Have you added in too many elective options and failed to meet core academic needs? Or perhaps you have been working too hard in one area only, such as Science, and you are not progressing with your students as well in English. Look to the decisions you have been making, the things you are “watching” and “eating” during your day, and eliminate those things that distract you from your academic success.
Another cause of nightmares is taking our worries and fears to bed with us. We go to sleep with a burden on our shoulders and that plays out in our dreams. In homeschooling, it is easy to worry about the methods and the steps. It’s easy to fret ourselves to the point of a nightmare if we focus our attentions on our fears. Instead of doing that, choose to focus your emotions on the gifts of homeschooling. Take some time each day to discuss things that you are grateful for with your children, things about homeschooling that have worked for your family, opportunities that you have had because you homeschool that you would not have had otherwise. Then at night, if you find that you are worrying instead of giving thanks, be sure to reiterate for yourself some of the things that you and your children commented on that day. There are always things to be grateful for – always – but sometimes we must choose to see them. It is a choice!
If you focus on the repetition of gratitude, watch what you are “eating” during the day, and make calm, thoughtful choices and decisions for your homeschool program based on knowing your core values and goals, you will be able to avoid the homeschool nightmares that you hear about from time to time in the media. Living the dream, not the nightmare, will then become much easier!